November 30, 2003

Mutton curry, and some other stuff I had to deal with today!

I'm here on a full stomach of mutton curry and rice. My mom said she was bored of eating the usual chicken and she wanted something more "meatier" I suggested that what she needed was human meat and that I was sure that could be arranged somehow here in Mumbai. She thought she'll stick to more familiar tastes so mutton it was. There's something that strikes our conscience deep withing about eating mutton, it never effected me straight up, if it was there on my plate, all cooked and ready to eat I'd eat it, hell it could be any meat. But I just discovered that we do have a conscience but somehow it's subconscious, ..yes....exactly that!

We went for our walk before dinner and as soon as we left the building, my brother pointed to a car with an animals head sticking out and said, whoa! those guys r taking a goat in the front seat! It wasn't a goat, it was a dog and it didn't even look goat like but thats what my brother's mind interpreted it as. Then I saw a dog walking on the road and thought, thats strange, a goat walking around all by itself, and then it hit me homer style D'oh! Not goat, that's a dog! I thought I was going insane but it was just my conscience probably trying to tell me not to eat these poor animals but my stomach doesn't agree. Oh well, dinner was awesome and I'm not seeing any goats anywhere so I think I'm doing okay!

Whats on TV?
Well, as of this moment, the Mrs. India competition is on the telly right now. Now, I'm pretty disgusted with this obsession I've noticed in some guys, of ogling and fantasizing about older women. Sure, Indian men want to be "mothered" but going on about how sexy Rekha is and how Raveena Tandon is getting better looking the more she gets older just seems bizarre to me, it's a sentiment I can't share with at any level. Anyways, the conestsants on Mrs. India look pretty damn good. Way better than most on Miss India by a long shot. Maybe cos these women aren't really that old, most have them have been married for just a few years. I don't see the point of this whole pageant htough, apart from the fact that these "oldies" have an opportunity to feel good about themselves. Oh well.

Okay, so someone finally decided to do something about the way-too-raunchy music videos that have been on air for the past year or so. Is this a dent to our "freedom of expression", well I'll have to agree with "Anupam uncle" on this one, having models do funny erotic stuff is hardly expression of any sort, it's a cheap marketing gimmick. I'm just surprised these bideos made it on air in the first place! They say the videos that were rejected were way raunchier than the one's on air, boy I would LOVE to have a look at those ones, I bet they were no less than a soft porn video! Bet we'll never find out now though.

My hope for the "next generation" od music video is this, that the models get into some serious shape and learn to dance real well, nobody can object to shapely girls dancing their tops off (Did I just say "tops" off? ;) in tune, in sync, make it look real professional and slick instead of stupid sleazy antics that we see nowadays. But if public demand means guys are getting off at the sight of fat mamas jiggling their jelly on telly, who am I to object?

Squishy problem
So it's official now, college kids in Bombay are getting hand jobs in beaty parlours all across the city. I was actually told these parlours were actually fronts for whore houses back when I was in like 7th or 8th standard, I took no notice of them then. You hear lotsa crazy shit at that age and you believe it all, nothing shocks you. But now we have this article in the papers letting us know exactly where to go, how much for a pop and exactly what the arrangement is. Thanks a lot TOI! Now even people who had no friggin idea are gonna be queuing up outside beauty parlours asking for a hand. As it is, I've noticed these ads in the papers offering "Exotic massages" and stuff so these guys sure as hell must be doing roraing business

Imagine, the ills in society we have to deal with in this day and age. We might not have straight roads or parks for our children to play in but we have lotsa sexy stuff on TV and handjobs on offer at the local beauty parlour. I think it's all this "Feel Good" factor thats going around, making people go out and seek a good hand.


Posted by me on Sunday, November 30, 2003

November 26, 2003

I'm back!

Okay! So I'm back blogging after a good two week lay off. Lots of off time, very little "laying", anyways, can hardly say I feel re-energized or anything. I just feel the same! It's amazing how quickly time flies, I can clearly remember what I was doing this time last year, funnily enough, last year doesn't seem that far away. This year 2003 has passed off way too quick, just another measly month left!

I hate to be going on about cricket on here but I will make an exception today cos I just heard on the news that Steve Waugh, one of my all time favourite cricketers has finally decided to call it a day. In some ways, Steve Waugh, to me is the ideal man. He has demonstrated mental strength, aggression, and intelligence on the field and compassion and exemplary conduct off it. He's a family man and yet on the field he's a tiger. He's more than any Indian cricketer will ever be, thats for sure. I don't think our bunch of overpaid, spoilt babies could ever do for charity the amount Steve waugh has done and promises to do in the future. On this note, I'd like to make a predicition on the upcoming India Vs Australia series. I know people are upbeat and looking forward to the series, so am I, but I don't think we Indians have the slightest chance. I think we're gonna go down 3-0. 1 match could be an inspired draw or a washout but 3-0 seems very likely. Ofcourse, I'd love to be proven wrong but our bunch has rarely done that in the past and aksing them to prove me and other critics wrong is probably too much of a task!

What have I been upto in the past 14 days? Well, I've been out shopping wuit a few times with my brother, he leaves in a little over a month and he hardly had any clothes so we shopped around a lot. Funny how I picked up a few htings I like along the way. I've said this before, I don't like shopping. Ofocurse, I admire the shops and the range of stuff you get in the stores these days but honestly, much of it is way over priced and I'm pretty damn picky about what I wear and I don't pick things off any store and wear them, I used to, not anymore. One interesting thing I did get for myself though, was a pair of track pants. Not the sporty type with that line along the side, this one is all black, and it actually fits like a pair of formal pants. Now the problem is when I wear them on the beach people probably think I'm running around in a pair of formal pants!!! Nobody's actually looked at my pants that closely yet, it's whats on top of the track pants that keep them glued so I'm not complaining :)

My friend Raj called me up yesterday. Pretty nice surprise that, I had actually lost hope on ever hearing from him since he left to "vacation" in the US in late July. I did think he overstayed on his visa and started working ina service station or something but that's not what he did :) He toured all over the US and then stayed with his sister in Hattisburg, Misissippi for 3 months! Apparently his sister was all bored and doing nothing so she told Raj and his mom to spend more time than they had originally planned to. Raj is full of stories from the US, ofcourse the country lived up to his expectations but he had his share of bad experiences as well. He came across quite a few rude waitresses and a downright racist manager. He said it's very naive to believe that racism does not exist in the US, it was actually pretty refreshing to hear a different perspective because I've met far too many desis with ALL desi friends in the US who say "Oh, there's no Racism in the US", being so dumb as not to recognise subtle forms of racism or not having had any such experience of your own does not mean it does not exist! Oh yeah, and I also hate shmucks who say Indians are racist. But more on that later.

Thats it fro now I guess. I'm glad I've been able to type out a few lines today. Sometimes it seems like you need a lot of courage to blog, or feel very inspired! I guess it was the former today! This Japanese horror movie is on HBO at the moment, I wanted to watch the one they had on last week but my mom insisted on watching some other crap. Ugghh. Fuck it, never been such a big fan of horror movies anyways. Watched Jim Carrey in Ace Ventura II last night, that has gotta be one of the funniest movies ever made, thank god for Jim carrey! Hahahahahaahah!


Posted by me on Wednesday, November 26, 2003

November 12, 2003

Bye Bye Srinath

Just came to know yesterday that Srinath has announced his retirement from international cricket! Goodbye and good riddance! God knows we could have done without his ages ago. It's funny reading all those tributes and stuff in the papers, I'd have liked the papers to go on about how he could have done much better if he weren't so stubborn, for years thinking he was the best fast bowler in the country. He was lucky many good fast bowlers in the mid 90's weren't given a chance, Abey Kuruvilla for example was devastating in his prime but he missed out. Srinath was too skinny for a fast bowler, hardly any meat on him. I remember teasing a few people by calling them "Srinath" when they tried to bow fast with skinny bones. He tried beefing up a few years ago by eating chicken and stuff but it's hard to undo years of rice and curd and the damage it does to your body. Anyways, So Sri hardly inspired any kids to take up fast bowling in our country, the way Waqar and Wasim did for Pakistan. We've just lost one of the most uncharismatic, uninspiring bowlers India has ever seen. I'm happy to see him go!

Anna oh Anna
So we're regularly being visited by top notch famous people here in Bombay this past month and a bit. First we had Prince Charles and now Anna Kournikova shows up from nowhere! It's always funny how famous people in India are hounded by a hundred people the moment they arrive at the airport, Anna Kournikovas arrival was no different! I bet she must've thought to herself "OH Boy! I knew I shouldn't have come here" the moment she stepped outside the airport! First she has a helluva tough time getting into her car cos there are a zillion reporters and people trying to get their cameras up Anna's butt, then to top it all off, the security guards start fighting with each other and then the lead convoy car lost it's way outta the airport!! Geez, who was driving the car??? A monkey?? A monkey with no sense of direction! Well, all part of the India expereince I guess for Anna, it should be interesting to see what surprises are thrown up over the next few days!

Another sex tape??
I saw Paris and Nikki Hilton on the Oprah show just a couple of weeks ago. It was a show about how rich kids lead their lives, whether they splurge all their money on all the fun stuff and stuff like that. So they Had Paris and Nikki Hilton on the show, they're heir to the Hilton hotels empire. They look very boney and blonde, I don't think they're too sexy anyways, they're big page 3 people in the US. And now, I read the news that there's this Paris Hilton sex tape all over the internet and Paris is weeping over it and her parents are exactly elated at the news! All seems like a bit of a publicity stunt to me but do these people really need to tape themselves having sex for the attention? How weird. Makes you wonder when the first Indian sex tape will surface. *Shudders* Knowing our Page 3 types, I wouldn't be too surprised actually!


Posted by me on Wednesday, November 12, 2003

November 09, 2003

It all evens out

In my last post I started off talking about the distant relative who's in town. Well, earlier in the week we visited her and her family after she came down to visit us. Now, we've heard a lot about this woman, she's my mom's cousin actually. Things is, my mom's cousin is very rich. I'm not talking noveau riche, classless people here, I'm talking serious scaery RICH. Now, I'm not one to admire people for their money alone, I admire people's brains and how they treat people and how they react to different circumstances. We heard a lot about this woman, that she was a wretched high nosed woman who judged people by their looks, by their status in society and stuff. Well, we met her and she matched the description to a T!

We didn't even want to go and pay her and her family a return visit. But we did do so, and I'm glad we did in the end. Thankfully, her husband and her daughter-in-law aren't such bad people. They were actually very nice. It was a bit of an education for both my brother and myself. A lesson in life really. This woman was nasty all her life, she didn't let my late uncle, whom I never met, stay with them because she didn't want friends thinking who this poor kid was. My uncle was a brilliant scholar and he just needed a place to stay and study because his father was a mad drunk. A little help then could have changed his life. He was murdered at the age of 23 by some jealous friends of his, it's a mystery till this day how everything happened. This woman treated many people in my mother's family this way, most of whom have passed away since, and now in a bizarre twist, she seems to be getting back some of it. Her Grand daughter passed away last year from some form of meningitis, she was only 12 years old and had only returned from the USA. This and some other incidents have put a gloom over her and her husband. It is sad to see, but it is life's way of balancing things out. Happy days will be followed by not-s-happy days and the lesson I've learnt from all of this is really how you treat people determines how you will be treated later on in your life. I can never imagine being so mean and nasty as to judge people by looks and stuff and hold it against them. Nature has a weird way making people realise this. I'm glad I've learnt this the easy way!

Anyways, so I also discovered I have distant cousins in the USA. I never thought I had any relatives in the USA. These two chaps are from the IIT's and took the all too familiar route of Masters, then Phd then kick ass job in USA. What is it with these IIT people? As much as I envy them, I don't think I'd ever want to be in their place really.

*sniff* *sniff*
No, I'm not crying. This summer like winter we're having in Bombay has been giving me the sniffles bigtime! I can't stop coughing and sneezing since the past one week. This is just insane. The AC is doing overtime, something we've never had to do in the month of November!

Putu's acting weird
Ever since the AC's been on at night, Putu the cat is cuddling up between my legs, and staying there throughout the night! I'm waking up with back pains cos of the position I have to hold throughout the night! He's never been this way, so it's pretty weird why he's behaving this way.

The Dentist Beckons
I've been putting off a visit to the dentist for the past few week. I have a filling thats got a bit of a hole in it now cos some of it's come out. And anything hot or cold, my nerves are letting me know! Ouch! I'll probably go when my brother goes to get his check up done. Gotta gear up for some serious drilling!


Posted by me on Sunday, November 09, 2003

November 02, 2003

Wake up call!

So we're woken up this morning by a phone call from a distant relative, who's come down to Bombay. This is someone like an aunt from my mothers side, I don't even remember what she looks like. BUt apparently her son has been down here for 2 years and never bothered to call but his mom comes down and voila we have a phone call. Anyways, so my mom says these people could visit anytime so we decide to spruce up the house, not that we live like slobs ALL the time but we needed some tidying up for sure.

So my mom and brother are busy doing all the cleaning stuff, the floor, the fridge, the ceiling and what not. I'm just sitting around there like an ass feeling totally useless When my mom blurts out, "You go clean Putu's bathroom". Yes, Putu the cat has his own loo and boy did it need some cleaning! Now, I've never cleaned a loo before but just for the sake of feeling useful I decided to take up the challenge. I got down on my knees with the brush and Sani Fresh and scrubbed away to glory, I did a pretty good job in the end. Now Putu has a shiny loo but he just hated the fact that it was all wet, for a while, and he felt like it was an invasion of his privacy! he was actually yeowling and letting the world know. Some gratitude!

Whats with the weather?
I'm trying to think of any place, apart from the southern hemisphere, where it could be so f***ing hot in the month of November! Whats with the bloody weather? It's hotter now than it was in summer. No wait! Summer was wayyyy too hot even this year. I'm sweating buckets as I'm writing this and I'm not enjoying this one bit. To top it all off, this stupid weather has given me the flu, well a very mild one, but my body kinda aches and my nose is runny and I was sneezing away to glory yesterday. I wake up drenched like a sponge in a bucket, thats no fun either!

Yesterdays match
Yesterday's hyped up match turned out to be a major damp squib. One would have thought the Indians knew how to play in their own backyard but NO, it was the aussies who looked like they belong here and the Indians just flew in from some far far country where they haven't heard of cricket! Why can't our team ever be consistent? Zaheer Khan showed how badly he can bowl, surpassing his achievement in the world cup final, to his credit he didn't sledge this time around! and Rahul Dravid showed us how hard a job Sourav Ganguly has, I hope Sourav recovers from his butt injury and gets back soon. I think his rude, sarcastic demeanour has a good effect on this bunch. Ofcourse the Aussies showed us how much class they have, and talk about reserve strength! Phew, they are so much better than the other teams in world cricket today it's scary! Indians should brace themselves for another brutal ass kicking from the australians!

In contrast, todays Under 19 match against pakistan was awsome. It's so cool beating Pakistan in Lahore, you could hear the sadness in the Paki commentators voices! But to be honest, the under 19s looked like a very ill behaved bunch, sledging and all that. I think this bunch will compensate for the lily livered sissies who played for Indian all through the 90's, they might not match up cricketing talent wise but they will go down shouting!

Movietime
Saw a movie called "Hot Money" on Hallmark the other day. It was a British movie and it was very cool. It was better than "Oceans Eleven" in some ways actually. I love movies where the underdog comes up trumps in the end. A movie about "Ted Bundy" the serial killer is on right now. Think I'm going to go watch this one. I've read a lot about this guy, he was one mean bastard. He's dead now ofcourse but boy was he mean!


Posted by me on Sunday, November 02, 2003